Your weekly satirical roundup of news from across the Caribbean — because the whole region deserves coverage, not just one country 🌴
🇯🇲 JAMAICA: Gas Up, Telecom Still Down, and the NHF Spent Billions on Obesity
Jamaican motorists woke up Thursday to gasoline at $170.83 per litre — up $4.50 at the pump, courtesy of Petrojam’s latest ex-refinery price adjustment. The Middle East oil surge is being felt from Kingston to Westmoreland, and in Westmoreland they have enough other problems. Five months after Hurricane Melissa, residents are still describing conditions there as “hellish” — patchy mobile service, spotty internet, and a general sense that the rest of the country moved on while they were still bailing out. Digicel says towers will be fully restored by end of April. Residents have heard this before.
On the health front, the National Health Fund has spent billions treating conditions linked to obesity, with Health Minister Tufton observing that Jamaicans are, collectively, getting sicker. Four new conditions have been added to NHF benefits. Tufton did not specify whether the new conditions are related to the old ones. They probably are.
On a brighter note: Jamaica and Adidas have agreed a new long-term kit deal for the Jamaica Football Federation reportedly worth billions. The jerseys will continue to be iconic. The football results are a separate conversation.
🇹🇹 TRINIDAD & TOBAGO: State of Emergency Extended, Doubles Vendor’s Son Kidnapped, and Rowley Calls Kamla a “Jamette”
Trinidad extended its State of Emergency for another three months after the House of Representatives voted 26–12 in favour. The country has now spent roughly 10 of the last 14 months under emergency powers — a statistic the government describes as “necessary” and the opposition describes as “evidence that it isn’t working.” Both sides are technically correct.
In more immediate news, a ransom of US$50,000 is being demanded for the release of the son of an Aranjuez doubles vendor who was kidnapped Wednesday morning. The Homeland Security Minister has placed police on high alert regarding nationals repatriated from the UK with allegations of murder and gun-running. A US military aircraft landed in Tobago to remove radar equipment. Nobody has yet satisfactorily explained the full situation with the radar equipment.
Meanwhile, former Prime Minister Keith Rowley — never one to let a slow news day pass — called current Prime Minister Kamla Persad-Bissessar a “jamette” in response to her allegations that the PNM is involved in criminal activity. Kamla made the allegations in Parliament. Rowley made his response from his home in Glencoe. Trini politics remains, as ever, fully committed to the drama.
🇧🇧 BARBADOS: Budget Drops, Flyovers Return From the Dead, and the AG Says “Brace Yourselves”
Barbados delivered its 2026–27 national budget on Monday, and the headline numbers are quietly impressive: debt-to-GDP down from 99.8% to 93.3%, unemployment at a record low 6.1%, and 19 consecutive quarters of economic growth. Finance Minister Ryan Straughn called it the first budget delivered outside an IMF programme in years. He also cut personal income tax by one percentage point, increased the reverse tax credit for low earners, and introduced a $100-per-month cost-of-living credit for pensioners earning under $50,000 per year.
The big infrastructure announcement: flyovers are back. A project first conceived in 2006, halted in 2008, and mourned ever since is being revived for the ABC Highway. The government already paid $20 million in damages when the original contractors were dismissed 18 years ago. Those contractors have apparently been re-engaged. Traffic in Barbados has not improved in the intervening two decades. The national consultation on congestion begins March 23.
The Attorney General offered a slight counterpoint to the celebratory mood, warning Barbadians to “brace for very difficult times” given global geopolitical instability. Between oil at $100 a barrel and a Middle East conflict reshaping trade routes, the AG’s caution seems well-placed. Barbados also conducted its annual Carib Wave tsunami exercise today — phones across the island lit up with emergency alerts between 11am and 12:30pm. Citizens were advised not to panic. Most did not.
🌍 REGIONAL NOTE: Oil at $100 and the Caribbean Is Watching
Every island in the region is navigating the same storm: oil prices at triple digits driven by the US-Israel-Iran conflict, rising costs at the pump, and the uncomfortable reality that Caribbean economies are price-takers, not price-setters. Jamaica raised pump prices today. Barbados is building flyovers. Guyana is technically the only country in the region actually producing oil — and still leaving US$9 million per day on the table according to its own independent press. The Caribbean’s relationship with oil wealth remains, as always, complicated.
The Caribbean Daily Brief covers Jamaica, Trinidad & Tobago, Barbados, and the wider region. All commentary is satirical. For detailed coverage visit Jamaica Observer, Trinidad Express, and Barbados Today.