The Yard Report
Kingston, Jamaica | Thursday, April 9, 2026
News from the rock. Unfiltered.
GAS GOING UP. AGAIN.
Effective today, Thursday April 9, gasoline prices at the pump are going up. The latest ex-refinery figures confirm the increase. Nobody is happy about this. The relevant minister will explain it in terms of global market conditions, the Strait of Hormuz, and forces beyond anyone’s control. Motorists on Washington Boulevard will explain it in other terms, none of which are printable. The price of a coaster bus fare will adjust by next week. The price of a beef patty will follow shortly thereafter. This is the cycle.
HURRICANE MELISSA VICTIMS STILL IN SCHOOLS (AND ALLEGEDLY CAUSING TROUBLE)
The Ministry of Education says it is investigating reports that students are being exposed to inappropriate behaviour by Hurricane Melissa victims still sheltering in some schools. The hurricane was months ago. People are still in schools. And now, according to reports, the situation has deteriorated in ways that require a ministerial investigation. The government says it is looking into it. The schools say they are under strain. The students say they just want to go to class. This is what happens when emergency housing becomes permanent housing without anyone making a decision.
REGGAE BOYZ: NO WORLD CUP, BUT THERE’S A CONSOLATION PRIZE
Jamaica missed out on a spot in the 48-team FIFA World Cup — which, given the expansion, is something of an achievement in the wrong direction. The Reggae Boyz will instead play in the four-team Unity Cup in London. The Jamaica Observer is reporting this as good news. Kingston football fans are nodding with the expression of people who have been managing expectations for years. The Unity Cup is not the World Cup. It is, however, somewhere to go.
SHANOYA DOUGLAS: WORLD NUMBER ONE
On a considerably brighter note, Jamaican sprinter Shanoya Douglas has topped the World Athletics rankings in both the women’s 100m and 200m. The yard is producing champions. When Jamaica can’t win on the football pitch, it goes to the track and wins there instead. This has been the arrangement for some time and it continues to work.
CRICKET: BARBADOS COMING TO TOWN
The 2026 West Indies Championship gets underway April 12, and Jamaica’s Scorpions will host Barbados Pride in what is being described as a first-round showdown between regional powers. Barbados has not lost to Jamaica in the first-class competition in roughly a decade, a fact that Pride captain Kraigg Brathwaite acknowledged while carefully declining to be smug about it. Jamaica captain John Campbell says the team has put in serious preparation work and is ready to make home advantage count. The match will be competitive. Whether it will reverse a decade-long streak is another matter.
AMMUNITION SEIZED IN KINGSTON 2
Police conducted an early-morning intelligence-led operation in Kingston 2 and seized unauthorised ammunition and firearm components. The operation was described as intelligence-led, which means someone told someone something, and the police acted on it. No arrests reported at time of writing. The operation is ongoing.
BISHOP OF MONTEGO BAY: ELECTED
The 155th Synod of the Anglican Church in Jamaica and the Cayman Islands elected the Very Rev Colin Reid as the new Bishop of Montego Bay. The yard now has a bishop. The diocese appears pleased. This is the kind of news that doesn’t generate controversy, which is a welcome change.
The Yard Report is a sardonic dispatch from Kingston. Sources: Jamaica Observer.