⚠️ The Bounty Board is satirical fiction. All ‘wanted notices’ target fictional situations, systems, and concepts — never real individuals. Published every Saturday.
🎯 BOUNTY BOARD
Week of April 6–11, 2026
“Wanted: answers. Reward: closure.”
🔴 WANTED: THE CORENTYNE RIVER FEES SOLUTION
Status: At large since approximately forever Last seen: Being discussed at a press conference Description: A bilateral agreement between Guyana and Suriname that would resolve the controversial charges imposed on vessels using the Corentyne River. Described as “imminent” multiple times. Has not appeared. Reward: Regional trade goodwill and the gratitude of every boat captain on the river Tip line: Ask the Ministry. Then ask again. Then wait.
🔴 WANTED: THE WALES GTE VETTING PROCESS
Status: Questions outstanding Last seen: Before the project director’s Venezuela connections came to light Description: The standard vetting procedure that is supposed to identify whether key personnel on major government projects have prior corruption links in other countries. Should have been present before a US$600M project began. Current whereabouts unknown. Reward: Accountability and approximately US$82 million Tip line: The GYEITI, if they’re still in charge of themselves
🔴 WANTED: THE DRIVER’S LICENCE SCAM LIST
Status: Promised but not yet delivered Last seen: In a presidential announcement Description: A list of persons linked to the driver’s licence scam that President Ali said would be published “soon.” “Soon” was announced April 9. The list has not yet arrived. “Soon” in Guyana covers a wide range of timeframes. Reward: Accountability and slightly safer roads Tip line: Office of the President
🟡 WANTED: THE KITTY ROUNDABOUT AGREEMENT
Status: Conceptual Last seen: Never existed Description: A shared understanding among all drivers who use the Kitty roundabout about who has right of way. This agreement has never existed in recorded history. Every approach to the roundabout involves fresh negotiation, improvised diplomacy, and at least one person making a face at another person. Reward: Traffic flow and fewer incidents Tip line: Whoever trained the driving instructors
🟡 WANTED: THE 78,000 REMAINING STREET LIGHTS
Status: In progress, theoretically Last seen: 22,000 installed, 78,000 remaining Description: The balance of the government’s 100,000 street lighting initiative. Current installation rate suggests completion in approximately four years. Citizens on unlit streets are waiting with the patience of people who have been waiting since before the initiative was announced. Reward: Safety, visibility, and the ability to find your gate key after dark Tip line: Ministry of Public Works, Bishop Juan Edghill presiding
🟢 BOUNTY CLAIMED THIS WEEK: CARIFTA MEDALS
Status: Retrieved Description: Six medals from the 53rd CARIFTA Games in Grenada. Speedeet and Wilar’s kite, however, remains at large somewhere over Suriname. Recovery status: The medals are home. The kite is not.
🟢 BOUNTY CLAIMED: THE EASTER ROTI
Status: Survived Description: One roti, at the seawall, Easter Monday, that was nearly destroyed by a kite launch gone sideways. The roti survived. The boys apologised. The auntie nodded. Full resolution achieved.
The Bounty Board publishes every Saturday. All notices are satirical fiction targeting systems, situations, and concepts — never real individuals. The Guyana Daily Brief complies fully with Guyana’s Cybercrime Act.