Yooooo wah gwaan fam it’s your cousin Leroy calling from the BX, 174th and Morris Avenue, shoutout to everybody at the spot on White Plains Road, and I just saw the news from yard and I had to hop on here before my shift at Logan start.

Listen.

THEY LOCK UP JAII FRAIS?????

I’m sorry — THEY WHAT?

Yo I been watching Jaii Frais content for LIKE two years now. The man is a VLOGGER. A VLOGGER. He go to parties, he put out content, he’s a MEDIA personality. How you gonna lock him up since Sunday because there was a SHOOTING at the party HE WAS A GUEST AT?

He got SHOT too!!! Read the article!!! The man had to hire Isat Buchanan — shoutout Buchanan — to get a judge to tell the police to either CHARGE HIM OR LET HIM GO by 6PM today. Six P.M. today!!! That’s in like four hours!!!

This is what I’m saying to my guys out here all the time. When I tell people I’m Jamaican they say “yeah yeah Jamaica sweet, jerk chicken, Bob Marley.” And I’m like yeah sure, but you don’t understand — yard different now. When I was growing up it was one thing. Now you go to a PARTY and end up in CUSTODY because you a vlogger???

That’s crazy to me. That’s literally crazy.

My mother called me this morning and she said “Leroy leave it alone.” I said Ma I’m not gonna leave it alone. Jaii Frais is FAMILY.

(He’s not actually family. I never met him. But you know what I mean.)

THEM WANT TO DRILL OIL?? YO??

Yo I was on the phone with my uncle in Mandeville last night, and he’s telling me Daryl Vaz want to drill for OIL in Jamaica. OIL. IN. JAMAICA.

First of all — SINCE WHEN does Jamaica have oil?? I thought that was a GUYANA thing. The Guyana boys over there, they was quiet for years and years and then BOOM, they pull up on everybody with oil money. Now my cousin in Georgetown driving a Prado. A PRADO. His WHOLE family used to live in ONE HOUSE. Now every cousin have a house and the house have a gate.

So now Jamaica want in on that? Okay. OKAY. But then I read — some economist name King say we SHOULDN’T find oil. He say it’s a CURSE.

A curse?

Yo. YO. I’m sorry but — if finding oil is a curse then CURSE ME. Curse me good. I’m in the BX shoveling snow in February for $28 an hour. If Jamaica find oil and my Portmore people start driving Prados I don’t care about no curse. Let the curse come. I’ll take the curse. I’LL TAKE THE CURSE.

The man — Dr. King — he went to UWI. I respect him. But my brother works two jobs at home. TWO JOBS. And Dr. King saying he don’t want Jamaica to find oil? I said to my girl last night, I said babe — these are the same academics that will argue you into poverty with a PowerPoint.

Drill. Drill the oil. Drill all of it. If there’s a curse we’ll deal with the curse when the curse come. Right now the actual curse is YOU ALREADY BROKE.

TRENCH TOWN BIRTHDAY PARTY

Okay so this one — I don’t know what to say. I don’t know what to say.

It’s a 29th birthday. Family gathered in the yard. Music playing. Food cooking. POLICE COME IN, DETAIN THE CELEBRANT, and residents found TWELVE SHELL CASINGS after the police leave.

There’s a SEVEN-YEAR-OLD BOY who watched his daddy get taken away.

Listen. LISTEN. I am not an activist. I am a guy in the BX who works the airport. But that’s a child. That’s a CHILD. His birthday memory now is the police taking his daddy and shooting up the yard.

And then — there’s a PHONE CALL? Where a man identified himself as a POLICE OFFICER and was asking the father “weh di camera deh?”??

Bro.

BRO.

Even I can read between those lines and I’m not a lawyer.

My auntie who still live in Federal Gardens texted me this morning and said it’s been like this for MONTHS. I said auntie I heard. I said we all heard. I said Kingston know. The Gleaner write it. The Observer write it. We all know. But what get DONE? That’s the question.

She said “Leroy the question done ask a’ready. Nuh ask it again.” And then she said “send some money.” Which I did. Because that’s how it go.

TRAFFIC DEATHS DOWN 50%

Okay okay okay — THIS is good news. Traffic deaths in March was HALF of what they were last year. Seventeen people instead of thirty-four.

You know what I had to do to drop HALF of my Costco receipt? I had to CANCEL Netflix, I had to CANCEL Spotify, I had to switch from oatmilk back to regular milk like a CRIMINAL. And Jamaica just cut traffic fatalities in half in ONE YEAR?

That’s a Ministry of Transport that’s COOKING. That’s traffic cameras WORKING. Or it’s Jamaicans finally understanding that the person in the oncoming lane is also a person. Whatever it is — I’ll take it.

Shoutout the Ministry. Shoutout the cameras. Shoutout everyone who drove slower in March. Y’all SAVED lives. Real talk.

ERNIE SMITH

And then — Ernie Smith gone.

Man.

You know my father used to play Ernie Smith on a Sunday morning while my mother made breakfast? “Pitta Patta” on the stereo. The whole house smelling like ackee. My father dancing in the kitchen in his banyan vest. You grow up with that kind of morning and you don’t realize till you in the BX as a grown man that that was the whole point.

Rest well, Ernie. Thank you for the Sunday mornings.

Alright I gotta go, I’m supposed to be at Logan at 3 and the train is running local today because of course it is.

If Jaii Frais come out at 6 — somebody text me.

If Jamaica find oil — somebody text me harder.

ONE LOVE FROM THE BX!!!!

— Cousin Leroy