Back-a-Truck — April 11, 2026

Back-a-Truck: the things Guyanese people actually say. Overheard, reported, and presented without further comment. Every Saturday.

AT STABROEK MARKET, TUESDAY MORNING

“De cash grant reach?” “Not yet.” “Dey say Region 9 getting it now.” “I ain’t in Region 9.” “Well.” “Well.”

EAST BANK, MORNING TRAFFIC, WEDNESDAY

“Move de car nah man!” “Where I moving it to?!” “I don’t know — ANYWHERE.” “Is one lane! Where you want me go — de canal?!” “At this point, yes!”

Bounty Board — April 11, 2026

⚠️ The Bounty Board is satirical fiction. All ‘wanted notices’ target fictional situations, systems, and concepts — never real individuals. Published every Saturday.

🎯 BOUNTY BOARD

Week of April 6–11, 2026

“Wanted: answers. Reward: closure.”

🔴 WANTED: THE CORENTYNE RIVER FEES SOLUTION

Status: At large since approximately forever Last seen: Being discussed at a press conference Description: A bilateral agreement between Guyana and Suriname that would resolve the controversial charges imposed on vessels using the Corentyne River. Described as “imminent” multiple times. Has not appeared. Reward: Regional trade goodwill and the gratitude of every boat captain on the river Tip line: Ask the Ministry. Then ask again. Then wait.

Daily Brief — Friday, April 10, 2026

Good morning, Guyana. It is Friday. The money is flowing, the roads are still chaotic, and the government has a new plan involving a database. Sit down.

Q1 OIL REVENUES HIT $159 BILLION

The Natural Resource Fund collected more than G$159 billion in oil revenues during the first quarter of 2026, according to receipts published in the Official Gazette. The figures cover the period December 30, 2025 through March 31, 2026 and include profit oil payments from ExxonMobil’s Stabroek operations. Offshore crude production averaged approximately 918,000 barrels per day in February, with the Uaru development expected to push output past one million barrels by year end. President Ali described this as evidence that Guyana is becoming “a global model” for responsible resource management, which is exactly the kind of thing you say when $159 billion has just landed in your account.

DJ Roadblock — Friday, April 10, 2026

🚗 DJ ROADBLOCK — Friday April 10, 2026 🚗 Spinning the hits and dodging the potholes since forever

Goooood morning Georgetown! It is FRIDAY and DJ Roadblock is LIVE in your ears, your eyes, and unfortunately also in your windshield because traffic is not playing today, people. Buckle up. Literally. It is the law and also survival.

🔴 EAST BANK DEMERARA: FULL LOCKDOWN ENERGY

People. East Bank this morning is what the government would describe as “a dynamic transportation situation” and what everyone sitting in it is describing as something I cannot print. The usual suspects: school drop-off traffic converging with people heading to Georgetown for work, construction equipment parked in a way that suggests the operator believes cars are optional, and that one minibus that has decided its personal schedule supersedes all traffic laws and the concept of lanes.

Patriots Portfolio — April 10, 2026

Patriots Portfolio: your weekly look at Guyana’s economic landscape — what’s growing, what’s coming, and where the opportunities are for Guyanese building toward the future.

THE HEADLINE NUMBER THIS WEEK: US$761 MILLION

Guyana received US$761 million in oil revenue in Q1 2026. Annualised, that projects to approximately US$3 billion in oil receipts for the year — before accounting for the Uaru development coming online and pushing production toward one million barrels per day by year end. For context: Guyana’s entire GDP was around US$27 billion in 2025 and growing. The oil revenue is not the whole economy. But it is the engine that is funding everything else described in this column.

Ramesh Sees It Differently — April 10, 2026

Good morning. The numbers are in for the first quarter and they confirm, once again, what this administration has known all along: vision, discipline, and petroleum produce results.

THE $159 BILLION QUESTION

Let us be direct. When critics said this government could not manage oil revenues responsibly, we noted their doubts. When they said the Natural Resource Fund would become a political instrument, we noted their fears. G$159 billion in a single quarter. Deposited. Documented. Published in the Official Gazette for any citizen to read. This is not an accident. This is the consequence of a government that insisted on transparent governance of petroleum wealth when the easier path would have been to spend first and account later. The easier path was not taken. The results are visible.

De Boys Seh — April 9, 2026

De Boys Seh is written from the perspective of Speedeet and Wilar — two 12-year-old boys from Pike Street, Kitty, Georgetown. Speedeet is Black, Wilar is East Indian. They are best friends and they have opinions about everything.

WILAR: Speedeet. Speedeet. Yuh hear de government give out $100,000 to people?

SPEEDEET: Yeah man. My granny get she cheque. She buy a new pot and put de rest in de bible.

Guyana Daily Brief – Thursday, April 9, 2026

Guyana Daily Brief

Thursday, April 9, 2026

Your 5-minute morning briefing. Four papers. All the drama.

THE CRASH GYANT APP (Kaieteur News)

The $100,000 cash grant rollout was supposed to be the government’s shining proof that Guyana has entered the digital age. Instead, it’s proving that Guyana has entered the age of digital suffering. Kaieteur News reports that despite the much-celebrated app launch, only about 90,000 people have actually received their money through it — on top of roughly 46,000 public servants who got theirs the old-fashioned way. Finance Minister Ashni Singh has acknowledged the frustrations but says the portal stays open and the government “will work with you to resolve it.” Meanwhile, hinterland residents face the added obstacle that many of them don’t have bank accounts — and opening one requires documentation most of them don’t own. So yes: the most oil-rich per-capita nation in the hemisphere launched a cash giveaway app that doesn’t recognise your fifteen-year-old ID card photo. Progress.

Uncle Ramesh Sees It Differently – Thursday, April 9, 2026

Uncle Ramesh Sees It Differently

Thursday, April 9, 2026

A pro-government perspective on the week’s events, brought to you by a man who has never once questioned a press release.

THE CASH GRANT APP IS WORKING FINE (FOR SOME DEFINITION OF FINE)

Look, 150,000 people have received or are in the process of receiving their $100,000 cash grant. That is a lot of people. Finance Minister Ashni Singh announced this himself, on Facebook, at night, which is the sign of a man who is dedicated. Yes, some people say the app is slow. Some people say the facial recognition rejected their fifteen-year-old ID photo. But Uncle Ramesh asks: have you considered that the app is simply very thorough? The government has promised the portal will remain open. Help desks are being established. Cheques are being printed for Region Nine residents who don’t have bank accounts. This is a comprehensive rollout. The people who are complaining have simply never been responsible for distributing money to a nation before and therefore lack perspective.

Bam-Bam Sally and de Rumour Mill — April 8, 2026

⚠️ FULL DISCLAIMER: Bam-Bam Sally and de Rumour Mill is 100% fictional satire. Every character, situation, name, and rumour in this column is invented for entertainment purposes only. No real persons are identified, targeted, or described. This content complies fully with Guyana’s Cybercrime Act. If you think this is about you, it is not, because none of it is about anyone.

“Sally mouth big but Sally heart bigger. Mostly de mouth though.”

The Rumour Mill — April 8, 2026

⚠️ DISCLAIMER: The Rumour Mill is entirely fictional satire. All characters, situations, and “rumours” presented here are invented for entertainment purposes only. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental. This content is produced in compliance with Guyana’s Cybercrime Act. No real individuals are identified or targeted.

“If yuh ain’t hear it from me, yuh ain’t hear it at all.” — Bam-Bam Sally, every Wednesday since she had a tongue

Weekly Progress Report — April 8, 2026

The Progress Report: tracking what is actually being built, spent, investigated, and quietly not explained. Every Wednesday.

THIS WEEK’S NUMBER: US$761 MILLION

Guyana received US$761 million in oil revenue in the first quarter of 2026. That is the figure from Kaieteur News, which runs slightly higher than the G$159 billion figure in the Official Gazette due to differing accounting periods and exchange rates. Either way: large. Arriving. Quarterly. The Natural Resource Fund is the mechanism through which these funds are managed. The Fund’s reports are public. Reading them is an option available to every Guyanese citizen and is recommended as a hobby.

De Boys Seh — April 6, 2026

De Boys Seh — Speedeet and Wilar from Pike Street with their Sunday take on the week.

WILAR: Speedeet. You know dey say de government announcing a digital registry for drivers?

SPEEDEET: Yeah. Track all yuh tickets and violations.

WILAR: You think they doing one for kite flyers too?

SPEEDEET: (pause) For kite flying?

WILAR: Our kite hit a woman roti today.

SPEEDEET: That was an accident.

WILAR: An accident that could be in a registry.

Speedeet & Wilar — De Kite and de Corentyne River

Speedeet and Wilar — two boys from Pike Street, Kitty, Georgetown. Every Sunday.

De argument start before dey even reach de seawall.

“A kite need a tail,” Wilar say. He was carrying de bamboo frame, holding it careful like it was something important. Which it was. Dey had spend two hours building it.

“A kite don’t need a tail,” Speedeet say. He was carrying de string and de extra plastic bag material. “A tail is just showing off.”

Speedeet & Wilar — The Easter Kite

Speedeet & Wilar: two boys, one friendship, Pike Street, Georgetown. Every Sunday.

De kite string cut at exactly de wrong moment.

Speedeet had been holding it for forty-five minutes. His hand was cramping. De kite — a big diamond-shape one he and Wilar had built from bamboo and plastic bag material de night before — was flying good. Real good. Better than either of dem had expected.

Den de string cut.

Patriots Portfolio – Friday, April 3, 2026

The Patriots Portfolio — for Guyanese who care where the money goes and where it comes from. Every Friday.

THE WEEK IN GUYANA’S ECONOMIC PICTURE

The 38% Tariff: What It Actually Means

Let’s be precise. The Trump administration’s “reciprocal” tariff imposes 38% on Guyanese exports to the United States. The baseline for most Caribbean nations is 10%. Guyana’s higher rate is almost certainly driven by the US trade deficit with Guyana — which exists because the US buys significant volumes of Guyanese oil.

DJ Roadblock – Friday, April 3, 2026

DJ Roadblock on the ones and twos. Good Friday edition. The vibes are complicated but the music still sweet.

EHHH! Good Friday morning Guyana! DJ Roadblock here, and listen — we have a LOT to process this weekend. So Roadblock going give you the playlist to process it with.

🎵 TRACK 1: “Pressure Drop” — Toots and the Maytals Because 38% tariff just drop on we head. Pressure drop indeed, bai. Pressure. Drop.

Daily Brief – Friday, April 3, 2026

Friday, April 3, 2026 — Good Friday. Things are getting crucified out there.

TRUMP HITS GUYANA WITH 38% TARIFF — HIGHEST IN THE CARIBBEAN

In what is arguably the biggest economic news of the year so far, President Donald Trump announced sweeping global tariffs effective April 5, imposing a baseline 10% on most Caribbean nations — but a punishing 38% on Guyana. The tariff is framed as a “reciprocal” trade measure, though analysts note Guyana’s trade deficit with the US is driven almost entirely by oil imports, not an imbalance that typically invites retaliation. CARICOM’s private sector body CPSO says credible analysis is needed before a full response can be given. Guyana’s private sector is reportedly closely tracking developments. The US Ambassador spent last week telling Guyana not to renegotiate its Exxon contract. This week, her government slapped Guyana’s exports with a 38% tariff. You really cannot make this up.

De Boys Seh – Thursday, April 2, 2026

De boys liming on the corner of Robb and Hincks. What deh say? Well…

On the tint crackdown:

“Bai, deh pull over every man except the one in de blacked-out government SUV. Dat one just drive straight through.”

“De minister say ‘don’t call me.’ She know exactly who does call.”

“Listen, meh tint was 24% — one percent too dark. Deh fine meh thirty thousand dollars. Meanwhile de man who thief fourteen million in aircraft parts get bail in four hours.”

Daily Brief – Thursday, April 2, 2026

Thursday, April 2, 2026 — Grab yuh coffee. Today in Guyana: dark glass, darker dealings, and at least one happy homecoming.

TINT CRACKDOWN BEGINS — “DON’T CALL ME,” SAYS MINISTER

The Guyana Police Force launched its nationwide tint enforcement operation Wednesday, the first day of actual enforcement after a three-month grace period. Motorists with window tint darker than 25% visible light transmission are being pulled over, fined $30,000, and directed to court. Home Affairs Minister Oneidge Walrond has made her position plain: “Don’t call me.” Traffic Chief Mahendra Singh has deployed calibrated tint meters at checkpoints across the country. In Berbice, several drivers were already pulled in on day one. The only question Guyanese are asking: will it be applied equally to the tinted SUVs with government plates?